Via the Women in Theology blog: For Shame.

Shame is an internal conflict within the individual’s psyche. Though it can be related to a person’s specific transgressions in complex ways (i.e., one may feel badly about having committed some kind of trespass), it always touches upon questions not only about what the person has done, but who she is. And the person that she takes herself to be is judged unacceptable. The desire for cathartic reparation or atonement does not strongly exist (though it can in “healthy” forms of shame; see below) because one does not believe that one can recover a fundamentally good or at least stable sense of self. —E. Lawrence

This is why what you let people tell you about yourself matters; why what you accept as your core identity matters; why the messaging your peer groups share about “people like you” matters. 

If your social network messaging is toxic, that is the air you breathe, the water you drink, the food you eat.

A toxic social network is slow death.

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